For Seniors only

1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed.**
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2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.**
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3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)**

4.. Make sure you put 999 on your speed dial before you begin.*

*5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.**
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6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.**
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7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.**
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8. Make all the noise you want.... the neighbors are deaf too.**
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9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.**
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10. Don't even think about trying it twice.**

(I sent this in large type so you can read it.)*